It's Better to Hit Them With a Fish

Why do people not tie their shoes when they have laces on them? So you try to kick the ball, and then your shoe has to come off and knock someone’s face. Sure, you were sorry but do you really understand what it’s like to have a weird stench hit your face? When your object that was on your feet, hits someone it’s just plain gross…especially in the face. It’s disgusting and I’m sure it’s caused the people to abhor from it. Some poor affable sucker has to get hit and is impelled to the floor. The interminable pain that they probably feel is worse than it looks, luckily most people aren't irascible. I’m not trying to sound like some weirdo manager giving a tirade but I’m trying to give some sage advice. TIE YOUR SHOES!

You leave your shoelace untied and you slip down the stairs from stepping on them. Uh huh, it wasn't your fault. Then whose fault was it? Some random person walks by and you blame them, as you yell at them while they entreat you to stop yelling. Your yelling reverberates through the halls and everyone comes out to see why. The haunted person with the memory of you screaming at them becomes despondent. John Doe gives up and decides to become recluse so he won’t get accused anymore.

You’re walking and trip on a couple of materials on your shoe. Yay! Now you’re on the floor and everyone’s staring at you like a freak. You’re tremulous eyes are watching everyone walk by…staring at you like some rapist. While you’re getting up some other chap falls in front of you and this profound feeling of knowing how it feels comes to your mind. I think I've proved my point; yes everything is perfect and peaceful while your shoelaces are tied. But when they’re untied…your life just goes amiss, so I've said it once and I’ll say it again. TIE YOUR SHOES BEFORE YOU WHACK SOMEONE OR BREAK A BONE! If your shoelace is untied…be prepared for a time of horror.

View of a Witness

The night was dark, there were no streetlights anywhere in sight. Near midnight is when it happened. I gingerly walked to the table after hearing a shriek in the house next to mine, and surmised it was out of terror. It was silent like a deserted town after the shriek. Clad in my pajamas I made a cursory search, scrambling through the inventory lists for the one with ink on the back. Numbers made of ink blobs.

Before this all happened it started seven nights ago. Every night simulated the one before, until that black hour of day I had been observing the house next door-every time. Every night it's the same thing, I always tried to sleep...but I always had this insecure feeling coming from that house. My dehydrated tongue would always sink to the bottom of my mouth. I grimaced at the fact that whoever was making me feel uneasy, didn't think that I would notice something wrong.

I made an endeavor to call my friend's telephone, however all I heard was the dial sound...she- didn't pick up. I called the police right after and luckily they answered. I explained the situation and they said they'd come in a couple of minutes. As I was tip-toeing back to the window I tripped over my leather satchel, gaining an abrasion to make the night worse. The police electrified me when they came about four hours after I had called. I ended up sitting next to the window, and then I heard someone shouting gruesome words from the house. The person making me uneasy had killed the old man.

That was too much. That was just too much to hear. I couldn't get the words out of my head so I succumbed to my sleepiness, and laid down on my bed. My eyes open and my consciousness still ringing. I never heard words from the old man again, but luckily...the murderer had been caught and I could rest at ease.